THIS is Why

I carry catfood (and nuts, water, chick feed, cracked corn, towels, plastic bowls, a net, thick gloves and various sized carriers) in my car...

I took my first few boxes of gifts to be mailed off to the post office and when I came out I saw two furry but a bit raggedy cats. Couldn't tell if they were emaciated because they were long haired. I assumed they were feral because they looked quite scared and dodgy, though when I approached them holding a handful of dry cat food they looked at me, wheels turning as to whether or not they could trust it. I figure that spelled hunger. So I got as small as I could and moved very slowly, holding out my palm. When I got too close, both scampered behind the fence but didn't run away. They were too interested in what I might have. I quickly poured the food onto the ground (then was upset with myself that I didn't do it where they could be more hidden while eating), and backed away.

The white cat came more easily but both took a few bites. Meanwhile I searched my trunk for anything that I could put a little fresh water in, since they might be parched after the dry, salty meow mix. When I brought a little blue bowl over with water, the black one leapt up on the fence post mostly hidden behind a wall of leaves. It took a long time before he came down.

I watched until the black one came down, though he stayed quite jumpy the entire time he ate. I took a movie of him jumping down and eating and looking nervously around while the white one sat nearby, licking it's chops and looking satiated. But it won't load -- tried it several times. So for now, a few pictures of the same scene.

I admit, I had many things to do but I sat in my car until they were done. I was parked right in front of them so I could shield them from anyone else coming along before they could eat. Had y been able to view the movie-that-wouldn't-load, you'd see that the white one is more relaxed, compared to the black one who stopped, looked up and around every few seconds. They both sniffed the blue bowl several times, but weren't interested in drinking. But it's there in case they needed to go back to it when I was gone. There was enough food for a second meal, which I hope they got in before the rain came in torrents last night.

I Spy A Golden Eye

I may feel like I'm not as sharp as I used to be in so many ways (I word search, am tired way too often, can be distracted by the multitasking overwhelm that modern life has become) BUT when I'm in nature, I'm highly alert. Every formerly dull sense is tuned in to the smallest of things. If something flickers in the lake, if there is a small movement in the trees, if there is a barely audible cry I pick up on it like I have SUPERPOWERS!

So I was out walking one early summer afternoon in The Park and there was the tiniest rustling.  I wasn't quite sure what had gotten my attention, just that it had. There was a ghostly sense of something, almost imperceptible really. I could not be sure I wasn't just mistaken. I squinted into the blue sky and the mass of newly full, vibrant lime green leaves and even with glasses on, could not make anything out. 

I just took a picture of the general area that got my attention, figuring if there was something there I might see it if I went home and enlarged the pic.
Sure enough, the below is what I got when I cropped it!!!!!

How cool is that? Owls are so mysterious, and usually are heard and not seen. I've just recently seen owls up close --which is saying a lot considering I've lived half a century. I saw one flying out of the smoke when I was stranded on the side of the one and only road during a giant fire on the island of Maui, the night before I eloped. Under the circumstances, I considered that it might be a spirit totem or something (either that or the prenuptial fire was a sign, lol). It had a very long wingspan but an abnormally large head for a regular bird, which until then were the only ones I'd seen. The eyes were so large and dark, and while all it's feathers stretched out when it was in flight, the fluffiness of it's head remained the same and that accounted for the proportion. It's one of those moments I'll never forget. 

Flash forward two years and I was face to face with several owls at The Center which you can read about HERE for starters (or simply click on the tag OWLS to your left on this page...).

Maybe one of you can identify what kind of owl it is. I know what kind it isn't. Not a screech owl... not a barn owl, not a great horned owl.  Any birders out there know? 

This Chinese Goose came to The Center a while back with a broken leg which happened when a dog ran after it and got it in it's mouth. I've seen it happen too often-- people are out walking their doggies and encourage them to chase after squirrels, ducks and geese. I'm not sure why. Maybe they assume the animals will be quick and get away and just provide a harmless romp for their pup. But we see some terrible stuff come in from this so I recommend bringing a ball/frisbee or tossing them a stick....

We'd had this duck for about a week. Cleaned and dressed the wounds, gave an antibiotic to fight infection and depending, an anti-inflam medication or something to help with pain. Made sure the visiting vets would check how things were progressing. This one was not stepping on the leg, so we tried to put him in a tub of water (seen below) to help him exercise the leg but he wasn't too interested at first. So we took him out, toweled him off, set him down and let him preen. We'd try it again another day.



We kept her for several weeks, and like most geese, she was very talkative. Since Geese mate for life and bond very deeply with another of it's kind, I always worry about their partner who has been left alone, wondering what happened to their buddy. And when I hear the plaintative wail from the one we are treating, I wonder if it is wondering the same thing. In a lull, I might go sit with a goose for a little, and they often calm down. I'm told that they don't relate this way, and that as a human, I may be stressing them out rather than comforting them. But I don't get this response. I don't try to talk to a goose, I just sit very still, like a friend at a bedside, and mentally I send love and thoughts of healing to them. (Don't think I'm nuts... it can't hurt can it? The world would probably be a bit better off it we all did this for each other, right?)

I'm partial to geese, since meeting and becoming quite involved in the partnership of Mr and Mrs Goose who you can read about HERE and more if you click on their names or just the label Geese on the right of this page. We've seen several cases of really bad wounds come in. But the woman who heads the center said. "Geese are really hardy and resilient." I held onto those words when I worried for them, and sure enough she was right.

This goose healed up well enough and now lives happily on that very woman's couple of acres with many other waterfowl. If I ever find a place to buy a home I plan have land and a little pond so I can provide a safe haven too. Don't think he's at all lonely now! :-)

I Give Thanks

Oh I feel wonderful and my heart is full (as my stomach was yesterday). Why? Because I finally got a chance to run up to The Center to volunteer for a few hours, and saw the two Fox squirrels that I wrote about last post. Last Friday I had to go out of town so I took them both in Thursday afternoon. It helps me to give them back if I get to be the one to settle them into their new tank, and put in some of the little things I know each squirrel needs... one might like a bowl to sleep in, another, fuzzy fabric, and yet another might need favor apples or avocado to chew on. I can make sure they have that, so the first night in the strange new place with it's strange new sounds won't seem completely foreign. I also get to give them the last feeding of the day, again to normalize their adjustment to new surroundings... I go home feeling OK to leave the little ones I've cared for night and day...

But within a few days, I see their pictures and begin to wonder how they are. As soon as I got back, I had out of town company and much holiday prep, so I just couldn't go in. I really found myself missing them, which I try not to do. My job is to be a foster mother, getting them from point B to C (A being that they are born and D being that they are big enough to eat on their own and begin the process of soft release).

But after I waved to my step-kids as they each drove to Austin and San Marcos and dropped my sister off at the airport, and I raced up to The Center... All the squirrels were gone but my two foxes. I was so happy to see them! They were still together, had just transitioned to eating only solid foods, and for the first time, I felt like they really knew me... I know we are not to imprint but I picked up the female and she curled right up under my neck and put her little nose to my chin and mouth to say hello.



She even posed with me for a self-pic of the two of us. And then I picked up the male and also took pics. I gave them each a pecan, which they heartily accepted, and I took some movies of them both eating them... marvelling how far they'd come in just a weeks time.

I got to check in on them over the next two hours, and that just made me feel good. Instead of wondering 200 times a day how they are, I can just look over and see. It will carry me for a good long while now.





After finishing their pecan, they curled up to take a nap...


And just before I left I looked in and there they were, sleeping on top of each other, just as they always had. I was so glad to know they were still close and have each other. Wonderful little beings...

Love is Letting Go...

Some of you know I had a very sick set of baby fox squirrels about 2 weeks ago, a male and a female, eyes closed.
They both came in, as many did, with some kind of terrible virus. Both had very stuffed noses and the female had it really bad. She was wheezing and clicking, though it was not the clicking you hear in their lungs that's associated with aspiration or pneumonia. Though I gave them each a drop of liquid benadryl 15 minutes before I went to feed them (to help them breathe easier while nursing) and had them on an antibiotic twice a day, it would not do much to relieve the symptoms.

The little female got worse as the night came on. I could take her back to The Center in the morning to see the vet, but was very concerned she would not make it though the night. I'd have been happy to pay anything for a vet in the city to see her that night, but when I called one of the expert rehabber ladies who run the center for advice, she said most vets are not familiar with wildlife and would not be able to do much more than we were doing.

Knowing I could get help in the morning, I prepared myself for a very difficult night. The little girl was gasping and her rib cage would jump with each breath due to the effort involved. I tried to set up a steam tent and sat under a towel holding her sleeping body. I tried to prop her up in her little bed in case it would make breathing easier, but squirrels are just too flexible and jumpy. So I sat upright in the chair in my bedroom with her on my chest for over two hours hoping it would make breathing easier.  I kept falling asleep sitting there with her, but I was determined to not let her down.  So I did something I rarely do -- I prayed and prayed hard over her... And I got online and asked my blog friends to pray for her, send her healing thoughts, or keep her health and wholeness in mind... whatever they felt comfortable doing. I have known this kind of thing to be very powerful, and thankfully, it was successful in the case.

She indeed made it through the night, and the next morning I got trained to give her very powerful medicine... one I had to wear gloves to measure out and administer, as it would do something to me if it got absorbed through my skin (tho safe for squirrels). It took a lot, but I finally got her on the mend. And then her little brother, who was never as bad off as she, started to get more congested and wheeze a little!  So I started him on the heavy duty medicine. After several long days and nights they both got better. I think the experience made them very attached to each other.
Unlike other squirrels who sleep then spend several hours exploring or playing, they spent most of their time together sleeping in dozens of uh-dor-able positions.

Maybe the medicine was the reason, or perhaps it was the cozy cereal bowl I stuffed with soft fleece fabric! But even days after they opened their eyes and were beginning to chew on nuts and apples, they were so attached that when I'd take one out to nurse, the other would cry after about 10 minutes of being alone. It was a heart wrenching sound and I'd rush to the tank, holding the other one happily feeding on milk, and the crying would stop. Sweet babies. Look at them!

But below is a hysterical photo of the female who grew stronger and healthier every day, fast asleep, hopefully soooo relaxed because she felt safe and secure. Nose always tucked under or against something... and look at those little feet! Click on any picture to see them enlarged.

Last Thursday, the morning I had to bring them back, I saw something unusual. The female was awake and in a very quiet mood. With her little buddy still curled up beneath her, she stared out at me. I don't ascribe thoughts to squirrels, but after I shot this and looked at it days after I wondered, did she know I was going to have to give her back that day? Did she know that she was all better now, brought back to health from a very serious illness?  Did I catch her reflecting in her squirrel way in that moment of transition, the ones we all have spent just before our lives are about to change? Did she know that she was moving on to the next stage of her little life?




Lol, probably not. But for a baby who would most likely have died, she did have a second shot at life. Fat, furry and bright eyed, maybe she was just saying thank you to her foster mommy and to all her unseen blog pals who prayed for her to get well. I think that's it. And I heartily join her in deep and sincere gratitude for all those who cared about her when I reached out (via e-mail and Jackie's Blog) and kept vigil with me through your good thoughts that night.

I hope it's gratifying to see these pictures and know you made a difference.

Lil' Sweetie's Chinny Chin Chin

One of the few squirrels I actually named was a female Gray. You don't want to think of the wildlife you are rehabbing as pets, or get too attached as you are returning them to the wild as soon as you can get them well and big enough.

But this one got a name kind of by accident.

She was so delicate and feminine. Instead of the usual rambunctious scrambling that happens when it's feeding time with squirrels, she'd settle into my hand to eat. When I needed to refill the syringe with milk, instead of the usual panic that food seems to be going away and the frantic hunting all around as I try to reintroduce the nipple that's standard behavior, she'd stay in my palm and calmly accept the next course. The little pumping motion they make with their paws was extra cute because she pushed very gently with the pads of her paws, her long, thin little fingers held up like a little lady with a new manicure. I found myself calling her Lil' Sweetie and it stuck.

Here she is as a weenie little babe.

THAT is a lil sweetie if I've ever seen one... don't you agree?

There was something else that was special about her. If I scratched her on her neck, she'd pull her shoulder back and lift her chin at an angle to get the most out of it. It is too hard to get movies of much of the adorable things baby squirrels do. I have only two hands and they are very active... and when they are sleeping, you have to snap quick, since they jump in their sleep and move 360 degrees at the slightest sound. Not to mention shooting through the glass of their tank, etc.... so I figured I'd never record this phenomenon.

But this was so much a part of Lil' Sweetie that to my surprise she even did it when deeply asleep. Here I was just filming her and went to give her a little love and... well, see for yourself.

BTW, squirrels jump and startle in their sleep like she did when I petted her paw whether you are touching them or not. I have no idea how they get any rest. They must have wired up little nervous systems that later account for the antics that amuse us when we watch them scurrying around trees or leaping from branch to branch.

I've since had a few who like their chins scratched... though it usually sets into motion an automatic scratching motion with their back leg. Don't dogs do that?

One last picture of her sleeping. I just love their little paws. When they put them on your hands, it feels just like a human hand... cat paws are more fur than skin and dogs paw pads can be a little rough, so when a squirrel puts it's little hand on you, it is always a big of a shock to feel the soft and warm skin against yours.

Stop back for more of Lil' Sweetie... !

Lunchtime!

I haven't had time to write a whole post for this but I'm just going to load it. This is more of the little girl gray, my 14th little rehab baby (see last post). Not a squirmy little squirrel. Some sit right in your palm like she does. Others get so excited they can't keep the nipple in their mouths and frantically hunt around for what they just spit out. Or they kick with their big back feet, a little like babies kick when you hold them in those chest harnesses... it's cute but it can make it a little tougher to feed them. Not my baby #14. She was easy.



Oh those bright little almond shaped eyes looking right at you!

It's hard to feed a squirrel with one hand and shoot a movie with the other. I figure the subject matter is so engaging you'll forgive me.



And when they shut their eyes because they are in bliss nursing! Only the hardest of hearts would not melt into a puddle....

I just took her back to The Center yesterday and stayed to feed her and be the one to see her go into her new tank with two grays who are a little bigger than her... and make sure that they all got along. Which they did. No problems whatsoever. I stayed to give her the last feeing of the day as well, and that always makes me feel better about returning them.

Today I went back and saw someone else feeding her and she is still the same sweet little love as she is here.

Late Baby

I've got a new squirrel I'm nursing for a few days. That would be #14 or 15 I think, since August. Didn't expect to have any more since baby season is long over, and the ones people may be finding and turning in to The Center are juveniles (between 5-10 weeks) who are half way weaned. We will care for them until they can be given to at-home rehabbers who have the room for outdoor cages and can oversee their several month process of transitioning back into the wild (called a soft release).

But I went in Thursday and there was a little girl with her eyes still sealed shut. She would probably need a late night feeding -- long past the hours at The Center --and I was way too happy to do it. I stopped to consider that I was just over the problems my allergies gave me from the last bunch -- eye infections, a terrible cough, a raspy voice-- and just getting back to normal in my life routines. I'd cleaned, put away all the squirrel stuff and started to get to sleep when I was tired and get up when I wanted without the babies needs ruling my life. With Thanksgiving just a few weeks off, and guests coming in, I thought better of it. But when I checked her chart I saw that she also hadn't --- TMI alert!!!--- pooped for the 2 days since she came in. And she was a really fussy eater. Not every volunteer at The Center is good with squirrels so I was concerned about her feeding too. I knew a few days of my attention and the added security of the quiet and dark I could provide at my home would get her past the shock of whatever had happened to her, and she'd be normalized in no time.

Sure enough, by Friday night she was eating more easily and her systems became regular. Yay. I like to think she feels secure now-- here she is sleeping after milk in the pocket of my flannel pajamas. She looked so blissful, I let her do that for a bit before I tucked her in in her tank. If you click on the picture you can see that sweet little face and outstretched paw close up. (SO worth it!)

Her eyes opened Saturday and she's gotten more active, climbing up the little fleece fabric I put on one wall of the tank, developing muscles and learning to hang upside down by her back feet. She began doing the instinctive gesturing for holding and eating nuts before her eyes were open, so I introduced a raw Macademia nut (the softest, for baby teeth) for her to chew on, and later put some walnuts and pecans in her tank. Those are soft and too big for her to pick up but she won't get anything lodged in her throat if I'm not around either. In the morning I find she's chewed on them... and quite adorably, has collected and stored them all under the little tree branch I put in.

All in all, I think she's going to be a fine, healthy squirrel!

Sky Series

A few nights ago the sky from our patio awed us once again. It's getting to the time of year that the sun has moved across the horizon and sets in a place that peeks out from the side of our apartment building. The building we lived in before is is just across the street. We faced west and while only on the 8th floor, we were just above the tree line, with nothing else blocking the way, and had a spectacular sunset view each night. We'd mark the calendar and the seasons by the setting position, which shifted slowly across the horizon line from left to right then back again once we hit solstice. It was our own sundial.

Now we face east and south, bringing us an magnificent sweep from the skyscrapers downtown past the Zoo to Rice University Village. The Mecom fountain, and beyond it, The Park's reflection pool and the blue lake sparkle back at me from my windows -- a refreshing break amid streets and low lying buildings. Some days we can make out clear to Galveston and the ship channel.

We always see the sunrise and the moon rise, but the sky on the west side only looks like this for a few months in winter.


As much as I have struggled at times with living in a city that doesn't offer much of what I thrive on, I think I need to focus more on things that I have been brought into my life that I would not necessarily find elsewhere. For all the "big sky', the gulf breezes and the storms that run fast and furious through Houston, we always have uniquely changing cloudscapes and air texture... and they make for some of the most beautiful skies, changing in every moment as dusk descends.

Whether or not our conditions in this moment are ideal, there is beauty to be found, and a wealth of extraordinary in the ordinary to be mined if we only can take it in.
What are those things in your day, where you live? Whether it's a bit of nature, moments with your child or pet or aging parent, your health or the fact that you have this thing called a car and it takes you places, are there small miracles around you which don't register enough?

A Magical Moment

It's not often that I use footage or pictures that I don't take myself but commenter Becky brought this to my attention and I had to share it with you. I can't imagine what someone did to get this footage. It's totally in focus (unlike mine) and is such a random moment, I don't know how it could have been captured except for an extreme case of being at the right place at the right time. Commenter DonnainAL suggested it might have been a camera mount in the forest.




Then commenter SIZZIE found a link on YouTube that apparently is the guy who took it. I subscribed to his "channel"right away.

So thanks to all those commenters who participated in YOU seeing this post, and especially to David Neils whose footage I think this is, and especially to the Elk and Mother Nature, who are responsible for the giant smile I hope you join me in wearing after seeing this!